✦ THE HOUSE IS DARK ✦ INTERMISSION ✦ THE MANAGEMENT APOLOGIZES FOR THE INCONVENIENCE ✦ THE ORCHESTRA HAS BEEN INFORMED ✦ NO REFUNDS ✦ THE USHERS HAVE BEEN SPOKEN TO ✦ ✦ THE HOUSE IS DARK ✦ INTERMISSION ✦ THE MANAGEMENT APOLOGIZES FOR THE INCONVENIENCE ✦ THE ORCHESTRA HAS BEEN INFORMED ✦ NO REFUNDS ✦ THE USHERS HAVE BEEN SPOKEN TO ✦
✦
THE HOUSE IS DARK
The performance you are attempting to attend does not exist, has been cancelled, or was never scheduled to begin with.
This is more common than you'd think.
POSSIBLE CAUSES:
◇ Wrong theatre ◇ The understudy ascended ◇ You have been misdirected by an unauthorized usher ◇ The entity ate the programme ◇ This was always an intermission
If this persists, consult the box office. (There is no box office.)